The Story of Ear

A lot of people have asked me (no one has asked me: I’m lying to make myself appear significant and relevant (I’m certainly not one of these)) why do you use so many brackets? Actually, they haven’t. What no one has really ever asked me, aside from, “Which side had the best uniforms in the American Civil War?” “Do you believe in sex after marriage?” and “Who is your favourite Grimsby Town manager of all time?” is, “Why have you got a picture of your own ear on the front cover of ‘28 Rants’.

A number of theories have not been expressed. The first of which, so that we can't see your face, might appear to have some substance. I share the opinion of First Nation Americans of photographers. They are thieves. They take something that doesn't belong to them, a person’s image, and claim it as their creation. But I am undoubtedly less fresh faced than many and it would appear too much a work of a hubris that borders on the abusive to place an image of that face before the twelve teachers that will see it.

Another idea that has not been expressed is that I have deliberately displayed my neck and greying sideburns to mark the aging that has occurred and that this is a somewhat abstract reference to wisdom. Alternatively, it might be that in displaying the ear I am either flirting with the reader in a quasi-Victorian manner or displaying – falsely - that the articles and through pieces continued therein are a result of superior (for which read non existent) listening skills.

No. All of these never dreamed up suppositions are wrong. It is because, among the things I am shit at, the visual and specifically that which involves computers are quite high up on the shitness scale, and I couldn't work KDP’s really easy templates.

I would like to apologise for the time and effort you took to read this drivel and the fact that you had to use muscles to click on it. But I have a book out (it’s on the books page of this website) and, so I am told, you have to let people know. In entirely understand if you unfollow me and tell your mates I’ve lost it.

Added Tue, 27 Aug 2019 20:55

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